The bottom lines: "I'd love to take you out like I said I would, honey/But there's too much month at the end of the money."

Stuart plays this throwback honky-tonk shuffle, originally recorded by Billy Hill in 1989, for all it's worth -- which isn't as much as it used to be. By the time he's done paying monthly bills, he's got no cash left for a night on the town.

More From TheBoot